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1996, the best year in movie history, pt. 70: Citizen X

This 1995 HBO production is much, much better than the average made-for-cable movie of that period. I’ve seen it ten or fifteen times. It’s rewatchable because of the acting. I cherish each facial expression, every vocal intonation and contortion – even though the (Western) actors speak with Russian accents of varying thickness.

It’s based on the case of a notorious serial killer. It takes some historical liberties, one of which I’ll mention at the end of this review. How discrediting this is, I’m not sure. I can’t check all the facts, but I ought at least to read the book upon which the movie is based. Citizen X is superficially (and, therefore, deceptively) realistic; it’s hardly Amadeus, which a viewer can enjoy in good conscience as a kind of fable, realizing that much has been embellished.

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Rostov Oblast, early 1980s. A body is discovered in a field.

Search the woods, Burakov, the forensic specialist (Stephen Rea), tells one of his police underlings. That’s where this person was killed.

It’s almost five o’clock, the underling complains.

I don’t care what time it is. Search the woods.

That night, as Burakov is concluding his post-mortem, seven more bodies are wheeled into the lab.

Have a nice evening, says the underling.

And that is the basic pattern of the movie: Burakov works hard to catch the killer while others drag their feet.

It’s clear that we have a serial killer on our hands, Burakov reports to a committee of local Communist Party leaders. The most prolific in Soviet history.

The response is not encouraging. Serial killing is a decadent Western phenomenon.

No wonder nothing ever gets done, Burakov confides to his immediate superior: the smirking, urbane, politically astute Colonel Fetisov (Donald Sutherland). Fetisov is on the side of the angels. But he is not a conventionally nice man. He has just been mocking Burakov’s death-odor in front of the committee – Next time, a little less diligence, a little more hygiene – scoring cheap points against his detective in public. But he means to aid him, behind the scenes, in the long run.

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The killer (Jeffrey DeMunn) is an anxious little man. He recruits his victims in train stations. Most are young. He lures them into the forest and stabs them to achieve sexual gratification.

The camera lingers on him after his killings.


No glib psychopath he. We see him on the prowl, awkward with potential victims, avoiding police, receiving tongue-lashings from his boss and his wife. Always wretched. Always bracing himself for the hammer-blow. He exudes as much dread in daily life as he does in his execution scene. It’s a haunting performance.

(The movie says little about his background, which is as harrowing as anything else in the story.)

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But the heart of the movie is the interplay between Burakov and Fetisov. Burakov is passionate and direct; Fetisov, ironical and cunning. Fetisov, especially, utters some delicious lines.

Burakov: He finds his victims on the trains!

Fetisov: I have never ridden the trains, but they do sometimes impede my limousine.

(Dick, my PhD adviser, used to talk like this; he, too, was on the side of the angels.)

Each man, in his own way, works for the good.


Toward the end of the movie, Burakov and Fetisov recruit a psychiatrist – Max Von Sydow, in a small but winsome role – who, congratulating them on an investigative success, delivers this line: May I say that together, you make a wonderful person.

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Now, the inaccuracies. The investigation spans twelve years. The characters don’t age. Burakov has young children; they stay young. This might be an oversight, or it might be a deliberate artistic choice. Not aging, Burakov’s children subtly bring to mind the children who’ve been killed, who’ll never grow up, who haunt Burakov’s dreams.

The more serious inaccuracy – the fabrication – is Burakov’s recurring conflict with the committee of Communist Party leaders, and especially with an ogrish, blockheaded bully played by Joss Ackland (in another entertaining performance) who seethes from the end of the table whenever Burakov reports on the investigation.


I’ve read that there was no such conflict in real life. (Again, I’d have to check the book to make sure.) Bureaucratic idiocies did exist in the Soviet Union, but they may not have been so influential in this case.

The fabrication adds drama to the story, and it makes Burakov’s heroism more poignant; it also establishes why Fetisov must operate as he does. Arguably, the fabrication is artistically necessary. The story isn’t much of a procedural. The haphazardness of the policing (not Burakov’s, but the force’s) deprives this crime story of the usual pleasure that comes from watching an investigation logically unfold. Instead, the movie is driven by its personalities; and these are compelling because of what they must overcome.

I won’t decide whether the inaccuracy is fatal to the movie. I simply don’t know enough. But it remains true that the movie is absorbing to watch, with characters who are movingly played.

Closing credits

What happened in 2023? It’s a blur. I get through a day at a time. I barely look ahead or behind.

Mostly, I chase after children who live only in the moment. They are rather wicked. (As I compose this, one of them is removing his diaper and peeing on the floor.) My wife kindly looks after them a few hours every third evening so I can record my thoughts on this blog; a week later, I’ll’ve forgotten what I’ve written.

I steal moments to do a little reading. A book or two later, I’ll’ve forgotten what I’ve read.

Someone at a party asked which books I liked best this year. I said Shakespeare, Harry Potter, and Narnia; I had trouble remembering anything not in a series. I had to check my list of “completed” books after I got home.

My life is turning into a series of disconnected events. I’m becoming the hero of Borges’s “Funes, the Memorious,” only without the memories.

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Before I forget, I wish to complain that the previously serviceable app Grammarly has quietly gotten much too big for its britches. Yesterday, I was typing in a document, and Grammarly sneakily auto-corrected “resistible” to “irresistible,” which is THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT I MEANT. This illustrates a larger point, that 2023 was the year when a lot of ordinary people started noticing (or reading online) that AI had “jumped the shark.”

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“You need to go to therapy, Sweetie,” says Karin. “This is the bleakest entry ever. ‘I remember nothing, and the robots are coming.’”

She is too young to understand.

Now that I think about it, it would be amusing to pay a stranger to listen to me read my blog entries out loud.

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Allegedly I groan a lot, even when I’m sitting still.

Do I groan, or purr? Jasper snuggles next to me as I type this, and our noises sound alike.


Jasper is middle-aged now; Ziva is almost middle-aged. They’ve both mellowed out. They hardly fight each other anymore.

I look forward to my sons’ attainment of this happiness.

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Every year, I read the book of Zechariah; and afterward, I am sorry to say, I forget about it until the next year.

It ends like this.
[14:16 ff. (NIV):] Then the survivors from all the nations that have attacked Jerusalem will go up year after year to worship the King, the LORD Almighty, and to celebrate the Festival of Tabernacles. If any of the peoples of the earth do not go up to Jerusalem to worship the King, the LORD Almighty, they will have no rain. If the Egyptian people do not go up and take part, they will have no rain. The LORD will bring on them the plague he inflicts on the nations that do not go up to celebrate the Festival of Tabernacles. This will be the punishment of Egypt and the punishment of all the nations that do not go up to celebrate the Festival of Tabernacles.

On that day HOLY TO THE LORD will be inscribed on the bells of the horses, and the cooking pots in the LORD’s house will be like the sacred bowls in front of the altar. Every pot in Jerusalem and Judah will be holy to the LORD Almighty, and all who come to sacrifice will take some of the pots and cook in them. And on that day there will no longer be a Canaanite in the house of the LORD Almighty.
So when you worry about war in Israel, or anywhere, think about that.

Christmas with Boney M. et al.


We went to Karin’s mom’s house for our final Christmas party. The best part was hearing stories about Karin’s grandma, who died in 2016. (Don’t tell anyone, but she was my favorite person from that branch of the family.)

Karin’s mom used to consult a book called Mrs. Dunwoody’s Excellent Instructions for Homekeeping.

Mrs. Dimwitty, Karin’s grandma called it.

Karin noted that her grandma was the “queen of ‘work smarter, not harder’.”

She liked to dump ingredients into a vessel and let them bake. Hence her fondness for cookie bars – which are cut out from a grid, not sculpted individually – and for casseroles.

And she’d start washing the dishes while everyone else was eating dessert.

That’s pretty much how I like to clean and cook, except that my appliance of choice is the rice cooker, not the oven.

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It was a rough Christmas. Samuel and Daniel opened many gifts and fought over them all day long. I kept thinking of The Gods Must Be Crazy (1980), in which Bushmen fight over a Coke bottle that has fallen from heaven. Would my children fight so viciously no matter what, or would they get along better with less? Some of the famous “peace” churches severely restrict private ownership. Does it help them, peace-wise? The Thomas Friedmans of the world think that competition and accumulation help to make for a more peaceful planet. I really don’t know. This is the sort of thing that ought to interest “peace studies” academics, those who talk about war-curbing and peace-building. How many of them are telling people to get rid of their possessions? I can’t imagine there’d be much incentive for that sort of message, even if it were correct, but again, I don’t know what those writers actually say.

A restaurant review

Samuel went to his grandparents’ house, so Karin & I tried a new restaurant I’d read about. We had to chase Daniel up and down the dining room. But we’re willing to do that now and again; it’s chasing two children through a restaurant that’s intolerable.

Besides, most of the time, we were the only diners, and the waiter was hiding in the kitchen. A rough-looking DoorDash driver skulked around, cursing. The food took about forty-five minutes to reach our table. A little before we received it, another couple came in. They surveyed the near-empty dining room with palpable dismay. They asked if we were open. We don’t work here, we told them. But yes, the restaurant is open. They sat down and made various criticisms. Then another couple came in. They, too, seemed disappointed. But they put on brave faces, girded their loins, and seated themselves.

The food arrived. It was unpleasant to eat, which is saying something, because I’m not picky. (And it was expensive. But we’d already accepted that.)

How was everything? the waiter asked, afterward.

I’m sorry to say that we politely told him an untruth.

Karin went to the toilet but didn’t use it because there was fresh urine everywhere. Maybe the angry DoorDash driver left it.

I won’t name the restaurant. It’s downtown. The interior is bright, clean, neat, and comfortable. The exterior is bizarre. The main entrance appears to be a former service entrance. To get to it you have to walk across an especially muddy, pot-holed stretch of parking lot. Getting into the parking lot is an ordeal. There’s one sign, and it isn’t easy to see at night. The restaurant is open just a few nights a week. I don’t see how it could survive without income from, how shall I put it, an avocational source.

Body-text fonts, pt. 22: Caslon no. 540

“Colorado Supreme Court Disqualifies Trump from State’s 2024 Ballot.”

Another in a long list of amazing yet ho-hum headlines about Donald Trump.

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Congrats, again, to Alexander Domínguez for carrying Liga de Quito to a championship – this time, in the domestic league. He stopped two spot kicks in Liga’s shootout victory over Independiente del Valle.

The prodigy Kendry Páez scored IDV’s goal.

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At least four parties to go, and I’m already Christmas-partied out. The partying hasn’t been bad, but the gorging has been. For the first time in years, I’m repulsed by the prospect of eating cookies and potato chips.

Come to think of it, I ate cookies and potato chips today. At home.

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There are thinner and fatter Caslons; of the fatties, my favorite is Caslon no. 540.


The italics are … dramatic. Good for occasional emphasis; bad in bibliographies.


The dubiously named QualiType Caslan is a serviceably priced (i.e. free) imitation of this typeface.

The world between them

I’m re-reading Murder Is Easy before the release of this feature-length BBC version.

It could be a technically superb movie and still disappoint. It’ll almost surely give Christie the Merchant-Ivory treatment, which is wrong for her.

The recent adaptations don’t capture Christie’s spareness. No matter how faithfully they render the plot and characters, they make the scenery and costumes too pretty. They embellish what the page (wisely) barely sketches.

Perhaps if Mike Leigh were the director …

If only Nicolas Roeg had adapted one or two of the creepier Christie novels, as he did The Witches and Don’t Look Now …

As T.S. Eliot famously said: “Christie and Shakespeare divide the world between them. There is no third.”

(OK, he said Dante and Shakespeare, but that wasn’t what he meant.)

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Shakespeare-wise, I have begun reading Coriolanus. How timeless these plebians and politicians seem!

Daniel, this week, decided to say dozens of real words. Previously, he had spoken gibberish.

Karin’s tender heart

I am James John
I have my helmet on


One more of Samuel’s imaginary people.

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Happy birthday to my grandpa. He is ninety-six. We went to his house for cake and ice cream.

Upon our return, a friendly kitten greeted us on our lawn. Then, while Karin & I were moving the children from the car to the house, I realized that the kitten, too, had ventured indoors.

Kudos to Jasper & Ziva for not attacking it.

Karin picked up the kitten and cradled it for a bit. I made her put it back outside.

The beastie was very calm with us. I think it’s used to people; it probably belongs to some neighbor. I suspect we’ll see it again. Karin left it some food.

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I may start keeping track of scholarly articles and monographs that acknowledge or are dedicated to me. The number is greater than you’d think. Quite a few mention audiences at Cornell University; I may not have said anything to the philosophers who gave those talks, but I was a member of those audiences.

Today I saw this especially pertinent dedication in Eric Olson’s book, The Human Animal: “To the unemployed philosophers.”

December’s poems

Samuel plays with imaginary people. He used to give them borrowed names (“Batman,” “Robin,” “The Joker,” “Little Jack Horner”) or bland descriptors (“The Little Guy”). But his latest inventions are original: “Ms. Javey” and “Lorianna de Jour,” who season their food with something called cat de brun sauce.

(I don’t recall having put on any French TV recently.)

He also makes up soccer players and moves their tokens around on a little paper field. My favorite is a Dane named “Ontoast” – presumably, a combination of toast (Samuel’s favorite breakfast) and onside or on target (he talks a lot about “shots on target”).

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Daniel has been keen on George and Martha: One Fine Day, a book by James Marshall. This book is my inspiration for December’s poetry selections.

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⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
A hippopotamusn’t sit
On lawn chairs, stools, and rockers.
A hippopotamusn’t yawn
Directly under tightrope walkers.
A hippopotamusn’t roll
In gutters used by bowlers.
A hippopotamusn’t fail
To floss his hippopotamolars.

The awful things a hippopotamusn’t do
Are just
As important as the lawful things
A hippopotamust.
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

(J. Patrick Lewis)

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⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
Similiter et omnes revereantur Diaconos, ut mandatum Jesu Christi; et Episcopum, ut Jesum Christum, existentem filium Patris; Presbyterus autem, ut concilium Dei et conjunctionem Apostolorum. Sine his Ecclesia non vocatur; de quibus suadeo vos sic habeo. – S. Ignatii Ad Trallianos.

And when this epistle is read among you, cause that it be read also in the church of the Laodiceans.

The broad-backed hippopotamus
Rests on his belly in the mud;
Although he seems so firm to us
He is merely flesh and blood.

Flesh and blood is weak and frail,
Susceptible to nervous shock;
While the True Church can never fail
For it is based upon a rock.

The hippo’s feeble steps may err
In compassing material ends,
While the True Church need never stir
To gather in its dividends.

The ’potamus can never reach
The mango on the mango-tree;
But fruits of pomegranate and peach
Refresh the Church from over sea.

At mating time the hippo’s voice
Betrays inflections hoarse and odd,
But every week we hear rejoice
The Church, at being one with God.

The hippopotamus’s day
Is passed in sleep; at night he hunts;
God works in a mysterious way –
The Church can sleep and feed at once.

I saw the ’potamus take wing
Ascending from the damp savannas,
And quiring angels round him sing
The praise of God, in loud hosannas.

Blood of the Lamb shall wash him clean,
And him shall heavenly arms enfold,
Among the saints he shall be seen
Performing on a harp of gold.

He shall be washed as white as snow,
By all the martyr’d virgins kist,
While the True Church remains below
Wrapt in the old miasmal mist.
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

(T. S. Eliot)


“I want a hippopotamus for Christmas; only a hippopotamus will do … ”

D1 and D2; Alan Jacobs

Daniel’d been having trouble seeing through his bangs, so we gave him the most drastic haircut of his life.



“Wow … different kid,” his Uncle David remarks.

I’m inclined to agree: I’d assign metaphysical import to this haircut. One boy, D1, used to live with us; another, D2, has taken his place. The genetic, psychological, and behavioral characteristics remain unchanged; but whereas D1 was innocent (if mischievous), D2 is responsible for misdeeds.

The leading corporeal, mental, and biographical theories of personal identity fail to account for this. I have more evidence, then, for my outrageous pet theory that personhood and personal identity are response-dependent properties. … I don’t really subscribe to this but suspect it’s as defensible as any response-dependent theory of anything.

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People in my orbit have been quoting from and forwarding blog posts by the consistently enjoyable Alan Jacobs. I never thought I’d have much interest in Thomas Mann’s Joseph and His Brothers, but Jacobs has changed that; and here is his nice little manifesto, “Bring Back the Blog,” of which I wholeheartedly approve.

Today, reading about Goodhart’s Law (but how well does it describe sports?, I wondered), I followed links and came across, in someone’s book, a reference to Jacobs’s admission that baseball, one of his lifelong passions, has come to a dead end. And my respect for him grew tenfold.

It turns out that, spiritually, I am Berkeleyan

We received our annual taste reports from Spotify (“Your 2023 Wrapped”). My listening habits were likened to those of the people of Berkeley, California; Karin’s, to those of the residents of Provo, Utah.

So, what do they listen to at BYU? Broadway tunes and Disney.

What do the liberal kids at UC Berkeley listen to? Evidently, Joe Hisaishi’s cartoon music. (Not so different from the Mormons, then.)

Other musicians who got lots of Spotify play from me in 2023: Boards of Canada, Stelvio Cipriani, Vangelis, Silver Convention, and Aphex Twin. And, too late to make the list, Enigma. I should note that it’s Samuel who asks to listen to much of this. “I want to hear Mix-Mad by Enigma,” he says (the album is MCXMD a.D.).







1996, the best year in movie history, pt. 69: Lust and revenge

Australian tycoon George needs a project for his spoiled, crisis-prone daughter, Georgina, to supervise. Why not commission a bronze statue? It’d be bulky, costly, valuable (at least, once the right critics have approved it), conspicuously placed in the wing that George built for the Adelaide museum, and therefore indisputably worthy of a tax write-off. As for Georgina, this is her sort of thing; she has trendy artist friends.

Lily, Georgina’s handpicked artist, wants to subvert the male gaze by sculpting a larger-than-life male nude. That’s fine with George as long as his tax write-off goes unchallenged.

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Enter a plebeian married couple, Cecilia and Karl-Heinz. She works in a New Age shop. He is unemployed. They need money. He wants to buy a cottage in a “cultured” suburb. She wants to give money to her cult. They’re at odds in the bedroom, too (he wants more sex, she doesn’t). One night, as they lie in bed, he propositions her. “Do you know what an OBE is?” she retorts. “Order of the British Empire,” he whimpers. “Out-of-body experience,” she explains.

Karl-Heinz submits his photo to the artist, who selects him as her model. The gig pays well. Now Karl-Heinz and Cecilia will have enough money for a down-payment on the cottage. Or to subsidize the cult.

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The modeling sessions would be utterly professional were Georgina not lurking in the studio. Cecilia isn’t threatened by her husband’s proximity to lesbian Lily, but she rightly mistrusts Georgina.

She confides in her guru, who has arrived from California to raise funds. The guru, realizing that a tycoon’s money is involved, sniffs a big score.

At this point, I had better stop describing the plot, except to note that (a) Georgina’s shrink prescribes her an SSRI with aphrodisiac effects, (b) other people end up taking the drug, (c) Cecilia is urged, against her conscience, to participate in the sculpting project, and (d) the artwork, for financial reasons and with the artist’s bland acquiescence, is turned into a subversion of a subversion of the male gaze.

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I haven’t seen anything much like Lust and Revenge, except one of the director’s celebrated earlier efforts, Lonely Hearts (1982), a work that is, if anything, stranger because its oddball characters enact a more conventional plot. Both movies hinge on the conflict between barely-suppressed male desire and the integrity of an odd but fiercely conventional woman. Lust and Revenge is particularly inspired in channeling Cecilia’s puritanism through kooky New Age beliefs. (Do these two elements combine in real life? I wouldn’t know.) Cecilia looks, speaks, and behaves rather like Ingrid Bergman in Cactus Flower; imagine that character in a cult.

Paul Cox, the director, is also known for a movie called Man of Flowers, summarized thus by IMDb: “An eccentric elderly man tries to enjoy the three things in life that he considers real beauty: collecting art, collecting flowers, and watching pretty women undress.” I haven’t seen Man of Flowers, but, having seen Lonely Hearts and Lust and Revenge, I’d wager that it, too, is more amusing than salacious.

Another movie of Cox’s, one I have seen, is the devastatingly serious Innocence (2000). In it, also, a woman’s integrity is challenged. That movie purports to be realistic. Lust and Revenge is deliberately cartoonish (and Lonely Hearts is somewhere in between). Tonally, Lust and Revenge is rather like Evelyn Waugh’s novel The Loved One, with its skewering of the commerce in sacred things (art, love, spirituality) and its grotesque concluding image of a human body’s (clandestine) desecration. South Australia may as well be Southern California.

Eating and reading: A report

The eating begins in earnest just before Halloween and continues through December. Meanwhile, the northern hemisphere cools. One becomes sluggish.

I gained five pounds over Thanksgiving. Seven, the last two weeks.

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Having fallen behind in my reading, I’m trying to get back on pace by reading these short books:
  • Gabriel García Márquez, Chronicle of a Death Foretold (I read this in high school and again in college)
  • John Hersey, Hiroshima (I read this in high school, too)
  • C.S. Lewis, Prince Caspian (I don’t know how many times I’ve read this; I’d forgotten how odd it is when Aslan, Susan, and Lucy frolic with Greek mythic figures – Bacchus, Silenus, and the Maenads – while the chaps are at war)
  • Joyce Carol Oates, First Love: A Gothic Tale
  • Georges Simenon, The Yellow Dog (my first Maigret novel – only seventy-four to go after this one)
You’d think I’d polish ’em off in one sitting, but that’s not how I do it: I like to drag ’em out.

Shakespeare-wise, I rolled my dice, counted down my table of contents, and landed upon The Winter’s Tale to read next. Doubly appropriate because (a) ’tis (almost) the season and (b) I need something somber after The Merry Wives of Windsor and Much Ado about Nothing.

This is the third straight play in which the fear of being cuckolded fuels the plot. I am beginning to understand, dimly but surely, that this was a big concern in Shakespeare’s time (and in Molière’s, not long after).

Incidentally, here is Sam Bankman-Fried’s notorious criticism of Shakespeare (with special mention of Much Ado). It’s forgivable. He wrote this when he was twenty years old; I believe he was a college sophomore.

And here, the polemical philosopher Michael Huemer takes Bankman-Fried’s side. I do like Huemer, but this isn’t his best moment. He puts too much stock in what he thought of the plays when he read them in high school. (Fashioning my objection after Bankman-Fried: What do the priors tell us about one’s highschool or college self arriving at one’s most judicious possible evaluation of Shakespeare?)

Stay gold, Michael Huemer, stay gold.

What we listen to at night

Karin & I diligently read the Bible aloud to our sons – or we’d done so until the last few weeks. 1 Chronicles is defeating us. All those genealogies.

We’ve resorted to playing a recording of 1 Chronicles.

I trust spiritual nourishment will come in time, after a little supplemental reading.

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These days, Daniel goes to sleep listening to classical music on Andrews University’s radio station, WAUS-FM.

Spotify chooses classical music better than I do. But an experienced radio DJ does better than Spotify. Longer pieces; obscurer pieces; better pieces.

Besides, Spotify sucks me into an eddy of Handel and Vaughan Williams and other British (or British-serving) composers. Not that I don’t enjoy that stuff; but Spotify’s algorithm has decided that that’s all I enjoy, which isn’t the case.

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Karin & I have been viewing the police procedural Dahaad, which is set in Rajasthan. I already knew a little about caste in India, and I’ve seen instances of racism and classism in Ecuador and the United States. But it’s been shocking to observe Indian caste dynamics play out on TV, in genre fiction.

Ecuador 1, Chile 0; Brazil 0, Argentina 1; Peru 1, Venezuela 1

The highlight videos might make you think we’re kinda good. That impression would be false. We’re very good at defending; apart from that, we’re putrid.

The coach has to go. Has to, has to.

Even so, I’m happy that we won and climbed to fifth place. (We were joint-fourth, briefly, but Venezuela reclaimed a point in Lima and moved ahead of us again.)

Brazil lost at home, to Argentina, and sunk to sixth. At least we aren’t Brazil. …

Ten months (ten!) until the next qualifiers. In that time, we could get a lot better. Or worse. Every team’s form could change.

November’s poem

Having reissued Kurt Vonnegut’s novels, the Library of America has been emailing me various writers’ declarations about Vonnegut.

This is by a Millennial writer, Ron Currie, Jr.:
People who knock Vonnegut often claim that his writing is adored by young adults, but that those same fans eventually grow out of him. The implication is that his work, if truly admired only by kids, is not to be taken seriously. But this misses the point. The point is that in his writing Kurt maintained, with great effort, the idealism most of us slough off. We call this self-degradation wisdom, or experience. And as is so often the case when we perceive a shortcoming in someone else, further reflection reveals that the deficiency is our own.
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A few years ago, some highschoolers wrote to Vonnegut. He replied. They framed his letter and posted it online, and it made the rounds. (Enlarge the image by opening it in a new tab and then clicking on it.)


Did the letter inspire inner creativity? It certainly inspired the highschoolers to turn it into a display piece.

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I am reminded of nothing so much as this passage by Tom Wolfe.
What about the idea of a permanent work of art at all, or even a visible one? Wasn’t that the most basic of all assumptions of the Old Order – that art was eternal and was composed of objects that could be passed from generation to generation, like Columbus’s bones? Out of that objection came Conceptual Art.

[§] The Conceptualists liked to propound the following question. Suppose the greatest artist in the history of the world, impoverished and unknown at the time, had been sitting at a table in the old Automat at Union Square, cadging some free water and hoping to cop a leftover crust of toasted corn muffin or a few abandoned translucent chartreuse waxed beans or some other item of that amazing range of Yellow Food the Automat went in for – and suddenly he got the inspiration for the greatest work of art in the history of the world. Possessing not even so much as a pencil or a burnt match, he dipped his forefinger into the glass of water and began recording this greatest of all inspirations, this high point in the history of man as a sentient being, on a paper napkin, with New York tap water as his paint. In a matter of seconds, of course, the water had diffused through the paper and the grand design vanished, whereupon the greatest artist in the history of the world slumped to the table and died of a broken heart, and the manager came over, and he thought that here was nothing more than a dead wino with a wet napkin. Now, the question is: Would that have been the greatest work of art in the history of the world or not? The Conceptualists would answer: Of course, it was. It’s not permanence and materials, all that Windsor & Newton paint and other crap, that are at the heart of art, but two things only: Genius and the process of creation! Later they decided that Genius might as well take a walk, too.
(The Painted Word, pp. 103–104)

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

I re-read Cat’s Cradle – the first of Vonnegut’s books I’ve read twice. I liked it better the first time.
“If you find your life tangled up with somebody else’s life for no very logical reasons,” writes Bokonon, “that person may be a member of your karass.”

At another point in The Books of Bokonon he tells us, “Man created the checkerboard; God created the karass.” By which he means that a karass ignores national, institutional, occupational, familial, and class boundaries.

It is as free-form as an amoeba.

In his “Fifty-third Calypso,” Bokonon invites us to sing along with him:

Oh, a sleeping drunkard
Up in Central Park,
And a lion-hunter
In the jungle dark,
And a Chinese dentist,
And a British queen –
All fit together
In the same machine.
Nice, nice, very nice;
Nice, nice, very nice;
Nice, nice, very nice –
So many different people
In the same device.
I said I liked the book better the first time, but then the first time I didn’t see much idealism in it, only a fantastical bitterness (as in Twain’s Mysterious Stranger, another book I ought to read again). The second time, more of the scenes seemed brightened with something like joy; I wonder if that’s what it was, or if the light was a mirage.

Venezuela 0, Ecuador 0; Argentina 0, Uruguay 2; Brazil 1, Colombia 2

The Venezuelans are at their all-time best. They’re on pace to qualify for their first World Cup.

Ecuador outplayed them in Maturín, in the far northeast, about as far as you can go without straying into CONCACAF land. What an uninspiring game this was. Neither team covered itself with the tiniest shred of glory.

Whenever the Ecuadorians would recover a ball in their opponents’ half, they’d send it to their back line to “recycle” possession. It seems to be what this coach wants them to do.

We’ve scored four goals in five games. We’ve scored in just two of those games.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

For the first time ever, Argentina and Brazil lost qualification games on the same day – Argentina at home, against the superb Uruguayans, and Brazil in Colombia. Luis Díaz, whose father, recently released from kidnapping, was in the stands, scored two late goals to sink the Brazilians.

The Brazilians are on a two-game losing streak – their first ever in World Cup qualification. It might become a three-game losing streak. They’ll play Argentina next. I expect the Argentinians to be in a kicking mood. They hadn’t lost since the first game of the World Cup. Before that, they hadn’t lost in dozens of matches.

Wodehouse and Lewis

I’ve never read a novel or even a story by P.G. Wodehouse, but his Wikipedia biography impressed me greatly. The sad turning-point in his life was, of course, the Second World War. Stranded in German-occupied France, he was (uncomfortably) interned in various places and eventually transported to (comfortable) accommodation in Berlin. There, in 1941, he delivered a series of humorous, very ill-considered radio broadcasts (How to Be an Internee without Previous Training). These outraged the British; after the war, he emigrated to the United States, where he lived out his days, never returning to his native land.

But first he was briefly detained by the French. Malcolm Muggeridge, then with MI6, visited him in Paris and became fond of him. Muggeridge wrote:
The broadcasts, in point of fact, are neither anti- nor pro-German, but just Wodehousian. He is a man singularly ill-fitted to live in a time of ideological conflict, having no feelings of hatred about anyone, and no very strong views about anything. … I never heard him speak bitterly about anyone – not even about old friends who turned against him in distress. Such temperament does not make for good citizenship in the second half of the Twentieth Century.
Wodehouse had said in one of the broadcasts:
I never was interested in politics. I’m quite unable to work up any kind of belligerent feeling. Just as I’m about to feel belligerent about some country I meet a decent sort of chap. We go out together and lose any fighting thoughts or feelings.
Around the same time, C.S. Lewis was giving the broadcasts in England that would become Mere Christianity, in which this remarkable passage appears:
I have often thought to myself how it would have been if, when I served in the First World War, I and some young German had killed each other simultaneously and found ourselves together a moment after death. I cannot imagine that either of us would have felt any resentment or even any embarrassment. I think we might have laughed over it.
Lewis was rather more belligerent than Wodehouse, and not only because of his stated willingness to kill. But the same spirit of chuminess was in both men.

What also struck me about Wodehouse was his work ethic. He was prolific and meticulous:
Before starting a book Wodehouse would write up to four hundred pages of notes bringing together an outline of the plot; he acknowledged that “It’s the plots that I find so hard to work out.” … He always completed the plot before working on specific character actions. For a novel the note-writing process could take up to two years, and he would usually have two or more novels in preparation simultaneously. After he had completed his notes, he would draw up a fuller scenario of about thirty thousand words, which ensured plot holes were avoided, and allowed for the dialogue to begin to develop.
Wodehouse remarked:
When in due course Charon ferries me across the Styx and everyone is telling everyone else what a rotten writer I was, I hope at least one voice will be heard piping up, “But he did take trouble.”

Racing; gift-getting

A colleague of Karin’s gave our boys a small, looped racetrack and two battery-powered racecars that look like dinosaur heads. Samuel and Daniel have been fighting over this wonderful gift most of the day. Mercifully, Daniel napped, so Samuel got a long turn by himself, and then I took Samuel to the grocery store and the library, so Daniel got a long turn by himself. Now they’re both playing with the racetrack again. I was going to write that they’ve gotten along better in the evening, but Samuel just shoved Daniel in the face.

“What a beautiful race,” Samuel keeps saying as he watches the dino-head cars tailgate each other around the track.

Each car occupies the full width of the track. So, no passing (or, as they aptly call it in Australia, overtaking).

“I feel this race is rigged,” says Karin.

But occasionally Daniel will pick up one of the cars, waltz around the room, and put the car back down in a random position on the track. So, this race is a bit like Snakes and Ladders.

I forgot to mention, last time, that I turned forty-two, and my parents had me over to eat baked chicken, which is my mother’s specialty (or has been since she found the recipe on the Internet a few months ago). I have been asking people to buy me fonts (which they won’t do) or used bookcases (which they promise to keep their eyes peeled for). My parents brought over a nice bookcase yesterday and I’ve filled it with overflow from other bookcases. I could use at least one more. My mother-in-law sent a birthday greeting by email, remarking on the fine, sunny weather; but I prefer gloom, and anyway it was the wrong day. I sent her a brief thank-you and a thumbs-up.

Potato Tots 1, Chelsea 4

Strangest game I’ve seen. Very good home team, previously unbeaten, blown out by pitiful archrival. Minute 33, home team surrenders player (straight red card). Minute 55, surrenders second player (two yellow cards). Home team better than archrival, all game long; nearly rescues draw after 90-minute mark; ultimately, loses by three goals. All game long, home team, unafraid of archrival, maintains brazenly high defensive line. Archrival unable to beat high defensive line. Archrival pitiful. Archrival’s main striker pitiful. Plays abysmally. Scores three goals. Blowers-out, trash; blown-out, bosses. Highly paradoxical. In context, utterly logical. Strangest game I’ve seen.

Body-text fonts, pt. 21: Plantin

Karin bought a babies’ bilingual board book with pictures of the characters from El Chavo del Ocho.

I read it often to Daniel, four or five times in a row. I read it in Spanish and in English and say all the characters’ names.

Tonight, poor Karin tried to read it to Daniel, and she didn’t know all the names and Daniel threw a fit.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

This early-20th-century typeface is my all-time favorite for body text. A stone-cold classic of hot metal type. Look at that glorious x-height. Excellent for printing on lousy paper (mass-market paperbacks, newspaper, etc.). Beats the pants off Times and its ilk. My favorite letter is the uppercase “R,” and the uppercase “K” has the same badass tail. Kudos to “E,” “M,” “N,” “T,” and “W” also. Weight-wise, I prefer the light/semibold pairing to the regular/bold pairing, at least in the larger sizes.

The text sample, from Jane Eyre, describes why we didn’t go trick-or-treating this Halloween.


It used to be normal for Puffin Classics to be set in Plantin, but lately they’ve been boringly set in Minion.

1996, the best year in movie history, pt. 68: The addiction

“It became necessary to destroy the town to save it.”

Kathleen (Lili Taylor) is a PhD candidate at a Lower Manhattan institution called the University of New York. She studies philosophy, but in this movie the discipline arguably stands for all of the humanities and social sciences. The discipline doesn’t seem very rigorous. Professors and students recite quotations to each other and solemnly contemplate photos of atrocities (the massacre at My Lai, the Nazi death camps). They talk about evil and determinism and free will. These are important topics, but I failed to detect much cogency in the discussions.

And yet this is an “ideas” movie. The main idea is downright traditional. It comes from theology, and it’s voiced by a vampire (Annabella Sciorra).
R.C. Sproul said we’re not sinners because we sin, but we sin because we are sinners. In more accessible terms, we’re not evil because of the evil we do, but we do evil because we are evil. Yeah. Now, what choices do such people have? It’s not like we have any options.
I never thought I’d hear R.C. Sproul invoked in a vampire movie, but what do you know, the director is Abel Ferrara, who is old-school and eclectic; he grew up Catholic and, despite having converted to Buddhism, appears to still trouble himself over original sin and heaven and hell. He also has used heroin and known people who were destroyed by that drug. In this movie, sinfulness is likened to bloodlust, which is likened to a craving for heroin.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

The vampire pulls Kathleen into a dark alley and gives her a choice. Tell me to go away, the vampire says. Tell me like you mean it.

Kathleen just says, Please.

The vampire bites her.

Has the vampire passed the craving on to Kathleen, or did Kathleen already have it? Arguably, what the vampire passes on is awareness of the craving, not the craving itself.


In the rest of the movie, Kathleen goes around biting people. She presents them with the same choice that she was presented with. When a person isn’t prepared to tell her to go away, she turns him or her into a vampire; she gives the person an education.

The person already has the craving, deep down.

One of her university classmates, as yet unbitten, reads philosophy while eating a hamburger. Kathleen is repulsed. The two activities shouldn’t be paired. The point of philosophizing is to enable one to resist one’s cravings. Philosophizing turns out to be a pitifully ineffective pursuit.

Kathleen becomes disenchanted with her studies.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

Kathleen apprentices herself to a guru, an older vampire played by Christopher Walken (of course) who claims to have learned to “manage” his bloodlust.
You know how long I’ve been fasting? Forty years. The last time I shot up, I had a dozen and a half in one night. They fall like flies before the hunger, don’t they? You can never get enough, can you? But you learn to control it. You learn, like the Tibetans, to survive on a little.
It’s hot air. Before long, the creep is belittling Kathleen and sucking out her blood, leaving her more despairing and famished than ever.


Of course Christopher Walken would be the movie’s closest thing to Satan.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

Everyone was guilty of what happened at My Lai, Kathleen initially argues (this is in an early scene, before she is bitten). The man who was punished for the atrocity was a scapegoat. Everyone should be forced to come to terms with the guilt.

She means that the guilt is collective – everyone contributed to some injustice that brought about the My Lai atrocity. After she is bitten, a more horrific truth is made evident to her: atrocities are committed because of an evil already in the perpetrator, an evil that lives in each person, that can only be curbed by death to the self, perhaps only by literal death. But death isn’t a choice for vampires, who are addicted, agonizingly, to sucking up life, to prolonging deathlessness.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

I checked out a library book by two local philosophers: The Good Life Method: Reasoning Through the Big Questions of Happiness, Faith, and Meaning. It’s a self-help book. Here is how philosophy can help you to live well.

It’s an easy book to read, but I’ve had it for weeks and now I’m out of renewals. I’m having trouble building up sufficient enthusiasm to get through it. Something about the book feels too pat.

Not having read much of it, I don’t want to criticize it; but after I saw The Addiction, I looked up terms like original sin, sin, and salvation in the index. Nada.

Odd, because I know that at least one of the co-authors is a Christian.

Here’s what I think Ferrara would say about this book.

Go ahead. Use philosophy. Question. Make a life-plan. Cultivate good dispositions in yourself.

You’ll still be addicted to sin.

The cravings will still rack you. You’ll still give in to them.

You still won’t be able to withstand the light. You’ll still flinch away from mirrors.


C.S. Lewis writes about an addict in The Great Divorce. The addict is powerless to rid himself of his addiction, which is like a fiendish companion that perches upon his shoulder. An angel offers to help the addict. Shall I kill it? he asks. The addict needs his addiction killed, not managed, not held in check by virtues methodically cultivated. And if the addiction is inseparable from the addict’s life, the addict needs to die. But that needn’t be the end. Jesus says: “I am the resurrection and the life.”

Ascension Island

Congrats to Liga de Quito for winning the Copa Sudamericana, and especially to Alexander Domínguez for blocking three of Fortaleza’s penalty kicks. Domínguez also tended goal when Liga previously won this tournament, in 2009.

Stephen says this is Domínguez’s finest hour, but I still prefer the epic time-wasting of 2021.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

I have nothing much to relate – the weekend has been low-key (the best kind of weekend) – so here is an oldish video by Un mundo inmenso that I’d somehow never viewed until tonight. It’s about Ascension Island, an out-of-the-way, volcanic, Guernsey-sized British territory in the South Atlantic.


Plenty of weirdness here. Best thing – or worst, according to one point of view: Charles Darwin had the idea of importing non-native plants to moisten the air a bit. One of the mountains ended up turning green, but its ecosystem isn’t up to the ecological purists’ standards.


The U.S. has a military base on the island. Apparently, quite a few of the Britons are getting edged out. Which they resent. They’re only temporary residents, but some have been on Ascension for many years, and like their Northern Atlantic counterparts they feel connected to “their” land.

I looked up the island’s job board to see about moving my family there, but only one job was posted, in waste management, and it wasn’t ideal, requiring various special driver’s liscences as well as unmarriedness. Besides, the vacancy was closed.

I guess we’ll stay in South Bend.

Justin E. H. Smith’s generation

I am a Scorpio, a Rooster, INTP or INFP (depending on what day of the week I take the quiz), and who-knows-what on the Enneagram. According to current BuzzFeed wisdom, my culinary preferences reveal that the Taylor Swift lyric –
if the story is over, why am I still writing pages?
(from “Death By a Thousand Cuts” – a song I don’t know)

– will describe my love life for the next six months. (Why stop at my love life? Why stop at six months?)

More credibly, perhaps, I was born near the temporal boundary that separates the GenX-ers from the Millennials. I assume it isn’t a sharp boundary. I exhibit characteristics of both groups. Alas, I seem to have been born on the boundary’s twerpier side. I’d rather be an X-er. So it was with some keenness that I tracked down the magazine article “My Generation” by the entertaining philosopher Justin E. H. Smith.

A few paragraphs in, my heart sank. Smith was presenting an inventory of what music he used to listen to and when he used to listen to it.

(I remember when it was more or less obligatory to recite that sort of thing to people. It got tiresome.)

The tediousness of his musical examples aside, Smith’s point is that the X-ers were the last cohort to believe in “art in the fullest sense”:
What is art in the fullest sense? It is impossible to give an answer that will please everyone, but we might say that it is a distillation of the spirit of its time that somehow succeeds in breaking out above its time, speaking to us across the generations in a way that transcends the limitations of its own local idiom and its own myopic present. It is shaped by its historical period but ends up saying something quite general about human suffering, human hopes, perhaps the possibility of human redemption (or not).
(It bears emphasizing: “something quite general” is not quite something universal; I think Smith is deliberately avoiding making a claim about universality. He is interested in pitting himself against those who disavow even the more limited cases of transcendency, e.g., of art that speaks across a number of generations.)

After the X-ers, creators and audiences stopped pursuing, valuing, or even acknowledging transcendency and narrowed their focus to content shamelessly generated for like-minded people. Authenticity, as an aspiration, became a casualty. Nowadays, creators and audiences, lacking any belief in a transcendent anchor to be true to, allow themselves to be pulled along by the strongest current, and everything eventually sinks into the whirlpool of upvotes, of (Smith emphasizes) The Viral, of The Monetized.

Whether or not he’s right about the chronology, Smith does seem to have identified two strikingly opposed ways of thinking, and it does seem that the allegedly newer way (the anti-transcendence tendency) has the upper hand, Zeitgeist-wise. Or so old fogies like myself like to worry.

A day at the “farm”

Last night, Daniel outgrew his crib.


For several hours today we trudged through a corn maze. The boys walked most of the time (Daniel was attached to a leash). Advice: Don’t try to walk small children through a corn maze unless you know the way out.

After we found the exit, we encouraged the boys to bounce upon a large, inflated cushion. Then we encouraged them to roll around with other youngsters in a pit filled with uncooked kernels of corn.

We stood in a long line and eventually bought donuts. While Daniel was eating his, he plucked a wasp off the picnic table and tried to eat it; now, his lip is swollen.

I would be remiss not to mention my other precious child, Samuel, whose birthday is tomorrow. He’ll turn four. I remember my own fourth birthday. I suppose that for better or worse, a lot is now happening to Samuel that he’ll remember for the rest of his life.

Sammy, did you like the farm?

Oh, yes.

Would you like to go again next year?

No.


Ecuador 0, Colombia 0; body-text fonts, pt. 20: Wessex

Our shaky goalkeeper, Moisés Ramírez, blocked a penalty kick by Colombia’s Luis Díaz. Good for Moisés! The much-criticized Kevin Rodríguez also played well. The team, as a whole, did not.

We need a different coach.

Other teams are bad enough, we might scrape through to the World Cup. But we’re nothing like pleasing to watch. (Again, I mean the team; some of our individuals are amazing to behold.)

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

This is from the introduction to the Library of America’s paperback edition of Helen Eustis’s The Horizontal Man (1946), which I haven’t read but might do (fall isn’t only a good season for reading horror and murder; it also befits the campus novel).

I did recently stare at the typeface for several hours, in Dolores Hitchens’s Sleep with Strangers.

It’s a rare one.
This book is set in 12 point Wessex, conceived by Matthew Butterick and finished at Boston’s Font Bureau in 1993. The typeface was inspired by the “surprising beauty of the wide-bodied italic complement of Caledonia … ”
The typeface reminds me of W.A. Dwiggins’s work more generally (e.g., Electra, New Caledonia, New Winchester).

Butterick, a lawyer and type designer, maintains a website that is perhaps the best free guide for amateur typesetters – that is, for virtually all of us. I say free, although Butterick (reasonably) would like people to give him money or else buy his book or one of his fonts. Wessex, however, doesn’t appear to be for sale; and I’m not sure that if it were, the proceeds would go to Butterick.

Safe return; tragedies; election; Baby Owen’s welcome

I’m back in South Bend, delighted to be with my own family and delighted by how delighted they are that I’m back.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

The big news is the tragedy in Israel. As with the Ukrainian tragedy, I have nothing useful to say, and I’m reluctant even to share others’ links, although my Internet go-tos – friends and foes – have offered up plenty of material. I’m doing my utmost not to condemn Joe Blow on the street or in the pulpit for taking this or that stance, for confidently allocating blame.

The other news is that Daniel Noboa, Alvarito’s son, is Ecuador’s President-elect. The populists hounded the last President, a businessman, out of office. Now the people have elected another businessman to replace him.

Ecuador will play soccer against Colombia tomorrow.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

This is one of the better birth announcements I’ve seen.


Owen appears to be his parents’ fourth child. (I barely know these people, but all my memories of them are favorable.)

Behold the principle of diminishing returns.

On holiday; Bolivia 1, Ecuador 2; Brazil 1, Venezuela 1

A satisfactory little vacation in Austin. I’ve done what I said I’d do, except I haven’t ridden the bus.

I’m about to finish reading my second book.

David took me to a good Colombian restaurant in East Austin, the seedy-but-gentrifying part of town. He lives in a much-nicer-but-also-gentrifying part of town. I gather there are other neighborhoods that leave his in the dust.

My legs are sore because yesterday I hiked through a stony, scrubby forest. I’m no birdwatcher, but I was delighted when a roadrunner crossed my path. It was an idyllic morning – except that the freeway traffic near the forest was very loud.

Back where Ana & David live, we did a little tour of the Halloween decorations.


Ada, my neice, is a chatterbox. She is keen to describe all the neighborhood calaveras (skulls). She tells us about Ellison, her imaginary older sister.

George, my nephew, likes to be read to and to dribble the soccer ball around the house.

We watched Ecuador play awfully against Bolivia. To our intense relief, Ecuador scored the winning goal in the last minute. Afterward, David and I listed four or five players whom we never want to see again. The commentator was a nice man from South Africa or maybe New Zealand who clearly knew little about South American soccer or soccer in general. By the end of the game, even he was remarking on how poor these players were, and David and I were warming up to him.

The other notable result was that Venezuela rescued a point in Brazil thanks to a late bicycle-kick goal. The Brazilians were very angry.

October’s poem

A dead racoon lay in the middle of our street, in front of our house. Someone put a traffic cone next to it to alert passing cars. The racoon remained there for many hours.

No city official collected the racoon.

Our next-door neighbors – jovial young men – held a memorial service for the racoon and buried it in their back yard. I applaud the sentiment but worry. Scent of racoon attracts more racoon.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

It’s chilly in the house. Our brand-new furnace provided heat for two days. Then it quit.

Not that I’ll be affected much. Repairs have been comissioned, and meanwhile I’ll fly to Texas to visit David, Ana, Ada, George, and Russell (the dog). The forecast there is for temperatures in the 70s and 80s, F.

Ana & David have jobs, and Ada and George go to day-care, so I’ll have time to myself. I intend to walk, ride the bus, eat, and read – things I used to do when I was a bachelor. I’ve pared down my cargo to these texts:
  • The Bible
  • Daphne Du Maurier, Don’t Look Now: Stories (I’ll probably just read one or two longish ones)
  • R. M. Dworkin, ed., The Philosophy of Law (probably just one or two articles)
  • Dolores Hitchens, Sleep with Strangers (unless I finish it tonight)
  • Alasdair MacIntyre, The Unconscious
  • Ronald Hugh Morrieson, The Scarecrow
I’ll use the Internet to continue reading Macbeth.

So, in addition to Scripture: texts of criminality, deviance, and buried desire. My usual seasonal fare.

Ecuador and Bolivia will play in La Paz on Thursday. David and I will watch that game together.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

October’s poem is “October”:

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
O hushed October morning mild,
Thy leaves have ripened to the fall;
Tomorrow’s wind, if it be wild,
Should waste them all.
The crows above the forest call;
Tomorrow they may form and go.
O hushed October morning mild,
Begin the hours of this day slow.
Make the day seem to us less brief.
Hearts not averse to being beguiled,
Beguile us in the way you know.
Release one leaf at break of day;
At noon release another leaf;
One from our trees, one far away.
Retard the sun with gentle mist;
Enchant the land with amethyst.
Slow, slow!
For the grapes’ sake, if they were all,
Whose leaves already are burnt with frost,
Whose clustered fruit must else be lost –
For the grapes’ sake along the wall.
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

(Robert Frost)

Dress-up

Twenty-five days before Halloween and, already, we’re in the thick of it. Karin found a Where’s Waldo? outfit at Goodwill; Samuel wore it most of the day.


The costume got him lots of compliments on the street – drivers were queueing up to smile at him and to respect his right-of-way – and at the library. One of the librarians carried a Waldo book over to Samuel. While I was occupied at the checkout machine, Samuel sneaked into the back offices (he also performed this trick last week), but he was so cute, the branch manager scolded him just a little.

Karin bought Daniel a full-body outfit of a skunk (one of his “spirit animals”). He hasn’t tried it on yet, but he’s been dragging it around the house. My parents, zealous Goodwillers, bought Daniel a Superman disguise that would look swell on him were it not a costume for doggies.

Here’s a video of Daniel resisting bedtime.

Birthdays; mischief; the Fruit of the Spirit; a word association; a walk; a rogue motorcar

Happy birthday to Karin; to my sister-in-law, Ana; and, apparently, to quite a few of my acquaintances.

Here’s an old photo of Karin and her dad.


My parents baked Karin a cake. Daniel got it all over himself, and we had to toss him into the bath.

We asked Samuel if he wanted to bathe; he demurred. Later – too late – he apprehended that we were respecting his stated wishes, that we in fact didn’t intend to bathe him. He grabbed some fistfuls of cake and judiciously applied them. So we bathed him after all.

Daniel, whom we’d dried and partly dressed, climbed into the water again.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

This morning, I was urging Samuel to be patient, which got him onto his favorite Sunday School topic – the Fruit of the Spirit – and so we read from Galatians 5, which also mentions walking along with (beside, behind, in step with) the Spirit; which made Samuel impatient to take a physical walk; which we did take, along the perimeter of the nearby school. We observed the physical education students riding bicycles upon the running track. I never got to ride a bicycle in P.E. in my day. … Even stranger, a few yards ahead of us, a car casually drove over the grass and mounted the sidewalk and ambled behind the tennis courts and into a parking lot. I could hardly believe I’d seen this, but I checked the grass, and the tracks were there. What was so strange was the nonchalance of it, as if it were a familiar route for that car.

1996, the best year in movie history, pt. 67: The secret of Roan Inish

This gentle movie is the closest I’ve seen to a live-action My Neighbor Totoro or Ponyo. Set and filmed in Ireland with Irish actors, it’s not just Irish. It’s based on a book set in the Outer Hebrides of Scotland; the book’s Canadian-born author, Rosalie K. Fry, lived in Wales. The movie’s director, John Sayles, is from the United States. His movies explore social issues. This one is more primal. Its protagonists are citizens of the sea.

They dwell on a sparsely-peopled coast. They aren’t outcasts or recluses or separatists; they’re pulled spiritually – or naturally (the distinction is blurred) – toward the water. Their numbers have dwindled, and they’ve moved to the mainland, deserting their native Roan Inish (“seal island”). They pine for their old home. They occasionally paddle their fishing boats over to Roan Inish, where the abandoned huts still stand, disheveled but sturdy.

Seals have long frequented this island and communed with the people. Legends say that some of the islanders were born of Selkies (seal-women). Selkie traits have been passed down. Some of the people are fair, some, dark; the dark ones are especially seal-like.

A golden-haired little girl, Fiona, whose family has moved away from the community, returns to live with her grandparents. (Her mother has died and her father is drowning his sorrows in the taverns.) The movie is especially Totoro-like when it observes the child exploring beaches and meadows, gathering mussels, and stirring liquid boat-tar for her grandfather. She listens to the locals’ wondrous tales: Seals save a youth from drowning. A man captures a Selkie and makes her his wife. A baby – Jamie, Fiona’s brother – is pulled out to the sea, by the tide, in a wooden ark-cradle; from time to time, the islanders glimpse a cherubic little boy bobbing on the waves in his cradle or running along the beaches.


These stories are told as if they might be true. Fiona accepts them as true.

The tellings are haunting, as achingly beautiful as any scenes in any movie. The movie is visually beautiful: It was filmed by the great cinematographer Haskell Wexler. The land and sky and sea are beautiful. So is Fiona, the serene little girl.

There is a tradition of literary criticism that says that stories fall into patterns of universal archetypes, and that these patterns can be arranged by season: romance (summer), tragedy (autumn), satire and irony (winter), and comedy (spring). (Never mind that not every culture recognizes the same seasons.) One season leads to the next. Children begin with romance. Romance fixes its gaze on a world apart from ours, idealized and inaccessible (at least right now). Edenic literature is romantic literature.

People outgrow Eden; or, rather, their injuries and sins bar them from it. They move on to sadness, then to cynicism. If they’re fortunate, they’ll achieve comic rebirth. To this end, it may help them to retain some picture of Eden, to acknowledge rather than disavow the imaginative role that romance plays in the cycle.

This is the kind of picture that The Secret of Roan Inish gives us: a picture of innocence, of the most absorbing and hopeful moments of childhood, of natural beauty, of a lost home worth seeking. A romance for adults.

A funeral; autumn; Dames Daphne and Agatha; who should have played Ariadne Oliver?

R.I.P. Carolyn (1934–2023), a kindly woman in our church who took a shine to our family. Karin & I attended her funeral – or Karin did; I remained in a Sunday School room with our offspring.

(Samuel and Daniel took turns gently pushing a doll in a pram, in circles, in the Sunday School room. By “took turns,” I mean they fought each other for the privilege.)

(Daniel sits on my shoulder as I type this and whacks me on the head. Will the violence ever cease?)

As the weather changes, my thoughts direct themselves toward pleasantly gloomy, autumnal things. Karin already has put our mermaid-skeleton on display. Indeed, she did so before the equinox. … Like my mother, who has gone to Minnesota to look at the leaves, I plan to take a short journey, within a month’s time; I have been thinking of what to read on the airplane. The current frontrunner is a volume of stories by Daphne Du Maurier: “Don’t Look Now,” “The Birds,” etc.

Kenneth Branagh has made a new Poirot movie, A Haunting in Venice, which evokes Du Maurier more than its ostensive source material, Agatha Christie’s novel Hallowe’en Party – which is set, not along the canals of Venice, but in the gardens and lanes of England. Ariadne Oliver is played by Tina Fey, which is another heresy. I should have preferred Nicola Walker.

I’ve almost finished reading the much-funnier-than-expected King John and have decided that instead of choosing my next play by lot, I’ll just reread Macbeth.

Some ex-residences

Forgive me for raking up old history, some of which I’ve surely blogged about before, but I have little else to discuss tonight. I must be getting on in years because I’m keen to list buildings I’ve lived in that have been torn down.

(1, 2) Mission houses, Las Palmas, Esmeraldas, Ecuador.

My boyhood home was the eastern house. As a baby, I briefly lived in the western house.

(3) Cottage on the property of Lakeview Church, Zion, Illinois.

My family lived in Zion from 1990 to 1991 (my third-grade year).

(4) Missionary Church Dorm, Quito, Ecuador.

My home during boarding-school years.

If I were asked to choose one former residence to live in forever, this would be it. My own Hogwarts.

It was torn down a few weeks ago.

(5) The Music Machine, River Park, South Bend, Indiana.

I lived in the tiny apartment above the office of the Music Machine, a DJ-ing business. I moved in when I married Karin. Less than a year later, the city forced us out and built a fire station on the land.

♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦

I used Google Maps to try to find the house in Seattle’s U-District in which I rented a room for four months, in 2004 and 2005.

Ultimately, I can’t be sure of the address. It was a grungy building surrounded by gaudy fraternity houses. I leeched wireless Internet from one of those fraternities; the network was called “Sex Gods.” So, if I’m ever back in that neighborhood, I’ll know how to pinpoint my old location.

I did find this lovely 2013 article in the University of Washington’s student newspaper about my landlady, who rented to ex-cons, sex offenders, and others who needed a break. I was in neither of the first two categories, but she rented to me after she called my friends and they confirmed that I didn’t drink alcohol. (And it was good that she rented to me, because it was about the only room in Seattle I could have afforded.)

I lent her my mom’s parents’ missionary memoirs, and she read them.

That year and the next, when I moved back and forth across the continent, alone, to pursue fruitless but necessary studies, the Lord put me in touch with some remarkable people.