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A new niece; the “little house” books; the Hardy boys

The time has come to salute our new niece, Belladonna “Bella” Jean Louise. She was born to Brianna – who now goes by “Atticus” (“Atti”) – and to “Atti’s” partner, “Ike.”

Karin went to Michigan yesterday and visited the child and her parents.

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Samuel pulled Laura Ingalls Wilder’s books off the shelf and spread them out across the floor. Which of them do you think caught his attention? That’s right: Farmer Boy. The only one in the series about little Almanzo Wilder. The only one about a boy.

The only one I’ve read, as it happens.

Karin tells me that when she was a little girl, she read all of the series *except* Farmer Boy. “That one is dumb,” her mom advised her.

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I had the opposite limitation. I tried, when I was younger, to read some Nancy Drew books. I failed. But I succeeded in devouring dozens of Hardy Boys mysteries.

Now, after some thirty years, I’m rereading one of my old favorites: While the Clock Ticked (the eleventh novel in the series). Samuel and Daniel will be reading The Hardy Boys before long, I expect, and I’d like to be conversant in that literature.

The pacing is breakneck. There’s an amusing scene in which Frank and Joe attend a party with their girlfriends for all of five minutes before they rush off again to pursue a lead.

The police are implausibly nice. They’d like nothing better than to share information with the teenaged sleuths. Frank and Joe’s friend group ticks the important boxes, race-wise. In just a couple of pages, the Italian-American “chum,” the Jewish-American “chum,” and the Irish-American “chum” all are introduced. (Introduced, but never developed as characters.) Nowadays, other races than these are the beneficiaries of token inclusion; but a similar diversity principle seems to have guided the great mercenary children’s writings of 1932.

Then, of course, there’s Chet Morton, a rounder character in more ways than one. The chums go hiking in the woods, and Chet keeps pleading with them to stop so they can all eat their sandwiches. This is where the book provides character development and comical relief.

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Back to Laura Ingalls. I picked up Little House in the Big Woods, also published in 1932, and read the first chapter. Its prose is plain but descriptively exquisite; I wouldn’t be surprised if it were a direct influence upon that of Nobel winner Alice Munro. (I’m especially reminded of her story “Boys and Girls.”) A lot happens in the big woods, but it happens out of view. The children wake up to see dead deer hanging from the trees. Pa kills the family’s pig; Laura stays indoors and listens while it squeals. Predators lurk outside the house.

The taste for this more atmospheric sort of writing comes later in life, I think. First comes a hunger for stories like The Hardy Boys, stories for one-track-minded readers. Not all children, but many children, are like greyhounds chasing a mechanical rabbit.

1996, the best year in movie history, pt. 53: Twister

I’m watching YouTube videos with Samuel. His request: “Some tornadoes in Nebraska.”

That’s my boy.





The best scene in The Wizard of Oz is the tornado scene. Same goes for Dr. T and the Women. That tornado scene turns into a birthing scene: Richard Gere falls out of the sky, wakes up in the desert, staggers into a peasant’s hut, and helps to deliver a child. My favorite, though, is the “tornadoes over Los Angeles” scene in The Day After Tomorrow.

Those movies have many things going for them, but that’s beside the point. As long as your special effects are adequate, your tornado movie will be awesome. That’s just a consequence of what it is to be a tornado.

You can make your tornadoes as realistic or as surrealistic as you like: tornadoes are ordinary and bizarre. You can have lousy actors. You can have a lousy story. You can have a tornado full of sharks. (No, I haven’t seen that movie.) The tornado itself will cover a multitude of sins.

Twister, mercifully, has lots and lots of scenes with tornadoes.

Its “human interest” story is pretty dumb. Roger Ebert describes it:
Melissa is not happy. One minute she’s engaged to handsome young Bill Harding, who has a promising career as a TV weatherman ahead of him. The next minute, she’s cowering in a pickup truck while tornadoes blow houses at her. And Bill can’t wait to find another tornado. “When you told me you wanted to chase tornadoes,” she tells him, “I thought that was a metaphor.” It is a metaphor, Melissa, but not for Bill’s dream. It’s a metaphor for Twister, a movie that chases tornadoes with such single-minded dedication that plot, character, dialogue and even your engagement all disappear into the Suck Zone – which is, we learn, that part of the tornado that sucks up everything in its path. By the end of the film, we have seen trees, TV towers, drive-in theaters, trucks, houses, barns and even cows sucked up by the Zone. Well, maybe only one cow. “I think it’s the same one, coming past again,” Bill tells Jo.
I feel sorry for Melissa (Jami Gertz), the only sane person in the movie. If I had to be married to Melissa or to Jo (Helen Hunt), I’d choose Melissa. Bill Harding (Bill Paxton) wants to choose Melissa but can’t. Jo’s got him sucked in, chasing after her dream, which is a death wish. (There are better death-wish movies from 1996: Maborosi; Normal Life.) When Jo was a little girl, she had to watch a tornado suck her dad out of a storm cellar. It screwed her up real good.

The domestic-strife-in-a-tornado theme would be detailed with infinitely greater sensitivity a year later, in an episode of King of the Hill.

Again, all of this is beside the point. This movie has tornadoes; and not in a coy way, the way Jaws has a shark but overwhelmingly consists of people waiting around for the shark. (Take Shelter might be the best tornado movie in that vein. If the people in Jaws are like, “We’re gonna need a bigger boat,” the guy in Take Shelter is like, “We’re gonna need a better storm cellar.”) The tornadoes in Twister are visible and plentiful, and they get better as the movie goes along. I confess, the first few tornadoes underwhelmed me, but the last two or three made the viewing worthwhile. Gene Siskel famously said: “I always ask myself, ‘Is the movie that I am watching as interesting as a documentary of the same actors having lunch together?’” In the case of Twister, a better question might be: Is this movie as interesting as a documentary about the same tornadoes? The answer is: Alas, probably not. All the YouTube videos in this entry are more interesting than Twister. But that doesn’t mean Twister isn’t awesome. It has a plethora of tornadoes. And it has lots of good location filming (in Oklahoma, mostly), and breathtaking skies.

P.S. I told Samuel the movie might be scary, so he stayed at the top of the stairs and listened but didn’t watch. He kept saying, “Oh my goodness! Oh my gracious!”

Beethoven is so sleepy

Sweltering heat this week. So, no mowing.

And then, much rain – especially, these last three days. So, again, no mowing; but the grass certainly has kept on growing.

Our neighbors mowed when the weather permitted. Alas, during those all-too-brief interludes, I was indisposed to mow. Everyone else’s lawns were made much tidier than our lawn. Today, one of our neighbors took it upon himself to mow our lawn – the front, but not the back.

I am actively reading at least seventeen books. How did I get into this mess.

As I type this, on my bed, Daniel performs his night-time ritual, which is to lie next to me, shrieking, until I am able to bring up Spotify and put on some nice Vangelis or Beethoven or Brian Eno. Then he rolls onto his side and brings his hand forward to touch my shirt. He sucks his pacifier and quickly goes to sleep.

In his crib, in the dark, Samuel comments: Beethoven is so tired. Beethoven is so sleepy.

Yes, he is.

Lament

Whatever did I do to receive several emails each day from Conservative Direct (which appears to be a spamming agency)?

What robot decided I was the sort of person who’d want or need to read endless “BREAKING” allegations against “Sleepy” Joe Biden? (Not to mention his son.)

I ought to mark this as spam, but, every day, the headlines reel me in.

Some of today’s offerings (pretty mild, really):

(1) “Biden Retiring the U.S. Dollar” (in case I’d missed this bombshell the first four dozen times).

(2) “Hunter Biden Probe Will End with ‘Very Sympathetic Plea Agreement,’ Former Federal Prosecutor Predicts.”

(3) “BREAKING: Does Biden Really Have COVID or Is It an Elaborate Cover Up?” To be fair, this is where I first saw that Biden has COVID. (I’m assuming it’s not an elaborate cover-up.) I guess it’s possible to get real information if you read between the lines.

Next, the blogs and tweets of academia. Leiter rails against the woke young PhDs who are one-upping each other on Twitter. (These people really are pretty ludicrous.)

Do I have a short memory, or is public discourse at its lowest ebb since I was born? Or maybe I should say “discourses.” I was reading a postmodernist historian today who disparaged talk of the “discipline” of history in favor of talk of various “discourses” of history. (More on him some other time.) Are political “discourses” usually this insular? Are they usually this money-and-status-driven? (How do these things get measured?) Is this just par for the course, humanity-wise? In Shakespeare, old Lord Timon puts all his money into “culture,” gets zilch in return, quits Athens, and goes to live in a cave.

I would keep on ranting, but Karin wants us to go to sleep.

Quino

Happy birthday, yesterday, to my dad. I spent a couple of hours at his house, along with Karin, Samuel, and Daniel. Stephen dropped by, too.

It turns out that my dad shares a birthday with Quino, the famous Argentinian cartoonist who died two years ago. If I had to rank newspaper comics in terms of, I dunno, some combination of intrinsic merit and life-impact, Peanuts would tower above all the others; and then would come Condorito, and then the gag comics of Quino. (I also grew up reading Quino’s daily strip, Mafalda, but was less taken with it.)

No niche-occupiers for me. I like my cartoonists to have hugely universal appeal.

Quino was just featured in a Google Doodle, throughout Latin America and in parts of Europe. I guess his appeal isn’t universal enough for the United States.

He isn’t a good caption writer. His best work is mostly wordless. Or it uses gibberish, as in this famous strip.

A few themes:

Owners.

Workers. (Uber, anyone?)

Politicians.

Law and order.

Reading/dreaming. (He is very good at drawing dreams.)

More reading.

Loneliness (one).

Loneliness (two).

Death (one).

Death (two).

The closest thing in this country is The Far Side. But Quino draws better, and with a certain grandeur.